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Offline Selphos

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #60 on: March 19, 2009, 11:19:04 pm »
That...is...awesome.
The moon is so red. Looks like it's going to be a fun night.

Offline Spinballwizard

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #61 on: March 20, 2009, 12:27:45 am »
A man goes to the pharmacy counter and asks for a condom with insecticide. "Surely you've misspoken," the pharmacist says to him. "Don't you mean spermicide?"

"No, insecticide," the man says. "My wife's got a bug up her ass and I'm going to get it!"

...I can delete that if it's too dirty for TSC. (Is there such a thing?)
<Tails> also "GET BLUE SPHERES" on a black-and-white TV remains the best special stage of all time

<Achlys> wat ave you done!
<Spinballwizard> apparently killed your h key

Offline Selphos

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #62 on: March 20, 2009, 09:43:05 am »
...Spinny that's just disturbing >_>

Though I didn't get it anyway
The moon is so red. Looks like it's going to be a fun night.

Offline Shadow Jacky

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #63 on: March 20, 2009, 11:43:54 am »
XD Spinny
my name has nothing to do with Shadow The Hedgehog

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Offline Alondite

Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #64 on: March 20, 2009, 02:22:17 pm »
that is pure, triple distilled win Spinny.

Offline magnum12

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #65 on: March 20, 2009, 06:25:16 pm »
Wrong, yet so funny.
Ever know what its like to get pwned by a book? Sonic certainly does.

Offline Spinballwizard

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #66 on: March 21, 2009, 02:35:12 pm »
Though I didn't get it anyway
Just wait until you get older, Sondow. Just wait until you get older. >_>
<Tails> also "GET BLUE SPHERES" on a black-and-white TV remains the best special stage of all time

<Achlys> wat ave you done!
<Spinballwizard> apparently killed your h key

Offline Nextgengamer9

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #67 on: March 22, 2009, 04:50:22 pm »
Hey flyby. Here's a good one. Ruby and Sapphire were in the Jewel shop and they were looking for jewels to buy. So They were looking in the glass and they find rubies and sapphires. So they ask the jeweler to have them and when they took the jewels they were stolen by Pearl and Diamond. So then Emerald comes in and tries to stop them, but Gold and Silver stop them. Red and Blue team with Ruby and Sapphire and beats Pearl and Diamond but they didn't have the two jewels. So who took the two jewels? No one knows, but can you figure it out?
Crystal stole it.

Person 1:Do you know what idk means?
Person 2: I don't know.
Person 1:Damn!Nobody knows!
« Last Edit: March 22, 2009, 04:57:04 pm by 457 »

Offline Spinballwizard

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #68 on: March 22, 2009, 10:45:37 pm »
That's not so much funny as it is incredibly lame. Next.
<Tails> also "GET BLUE SPHERES" on a black-and-white TV remains the best special stage of all time

<Achlys> wat ave you done!
<Spinballwizard> apparently killed your h key

Offline magnum12

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #69 on: March 23, 2009, 02:47:07 am »
Ever know what its like to get pwned by a book? Sonic certainly does.

Offline Alondite

Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #70 on: March 23, 2009, 11:50:45 pm »
The chicken and the egg are laying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face while the egg is frowning and looking slightly annoyed.

The egg mutters "Well I guess that answers that riddle".

Offline Selphos

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #71 on: March 24, 2009, 05:40:20 am »
Alondite get your most sexual member title back >_>
The moon is so red. Looks like it's going to be a fun night.

Offline Alondite

Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #72 on: March 24, 2009, 07:31:08 am »
aw...but I like being the sexiest member :( .  Ok ok...lol, I guess I should change it back.

Offline Selphos

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #73 on: March 24, 2009, 05:17:06 pm »
aw...but I like being the sexiest member :( .  Ok ok...lol, I guess I should change it back.

"TSC's most sexual and sexiest member"?
The moon is so red. Looks like it's going to be a fun night.

Offline Alondite

Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #74 on: March 24, 2009, 08:49:30 pm »
MOST SEXUALIEST?!?!?!1?1?1 :O!!!1!

Offline Aitamen

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #75 on: March 25, 2009, 10:43:06 am »
Alondite get your most sexual member title back >_>

I resent this on many levels...
Year 33 — The Malkavians claim that their greatest practical joke happened during this year, when they perform a bit of graverobbing  in Jerusalem.
-- Vampire: The Masquerade

Offline Selphos

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #76 on: March 27, 2009, 04:25:30 pm »
Alondite get your most sexual member title back >_>

I resent this on many levels...

Explanation plz?
The moon is so red. Looks like it's going to be a fun night.

Offline Aitamen

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #77 on: March 27, 2009, 05:24:12 pm »
Explanation plz?

For a straight person to be called the most sexual is just plain wrong...

if there's any lack of lewdness in my speech or actions it's for the benefit of those around me, because I know most/many aren't interested in sex in a social atmosphere...

I do my best to avoid the four topics of intellectual conversation, while here at TSC....  it's harder than it looks...
Year 33 — The Malkavians claim that their greatest practical joke happened during this year, when they perform a bit of graverobbing  in Jerusalem.
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Offline Upthorn

Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #78 on: March 27, 2009, 05:39:01 pm »
Explanation plz?

For a straight person to be called the most sexual is just plain wrong...
Sexual orientation is completely uncorrelated to a person being sexually minded.
"most sexual" refers to the latter, not the former, and of all the people on the forum Alondite seems to be the most likely to be thinking about sex at any given time. Your arguement makes no logical sense.
Go not to the linguaphiles for help, for they will say both "Yes" and "No" and "That reminds me of an interesting story about long vowels in Upper Sorbian which I must tell you right now..."

Offline General Throatstomper

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #79 on: April 04, 2009, 12:45:15 am »
My yoga instructor had a mental breakdown after I read the relaxation piece for my routine. She took a week's leave of absence, and when she came back we started fencing. I have entertaining stories.

The first day of the program, we picked foils and practiced thrusting. Since I put my left foot forward with a right handed foil, lunging with my my right heel back, she explained to me that I was left handed. I told her that I was ambidextrous and just put myself into what was a naturally defensive position, so she brought my a leftie rapier and said it was ok to be different. I don't think she knows what the word ambidextrous means, but I didn't care enough to argue the point. She was hostile when someone else told her why she was being ridiculous, and insisted that I would be better leading left. It's quite amusing, actually, because nobody thinks to reverse their sword motions against me; I wind up winning duels because my opponents do dumb things like try to stab inwards behind my back or swat my blade closer to themselves when it would knock a rightie's away from the chest.

There was a moment of high irony, though. To work on precision against a human target, she had us partner up to stab each other repeatedly. We weren't supposed to move, and some people were really into it...which sounds like it could end in serious injury. When someone poked me in the stomach, I decided that I would pretend I was horribly injured to screw with them. I dropped to the floor and curled into a ball before getting up and telling them I was just kidding. Their next hit shoved the tip (mind, the blunt had fallen off so it was just a sharp metal stick) right into my belly button. The pain from that provides you with 20 seconds of immobilizing pain, followed by a good week of thinking at all times about where your belly button is in relation to snagging objects.


I HOPE YOU DO

Offline Eis Makai

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #80 on: April 07, 2009, 01:11:57 pm »
DaleG: I know I know! We can play Sonic '06 for the great times we had!
Nightmuse: We have no great times in Sonic '06!
Eis: Wait I know! We will play Sonic Pocket Adventure!
DaleG and Nightmuse: BOOO!
Tikal: That is even worse than Sonic '06 because I am not in it!
SonicAD: Really! we should not get SkyL involved in this!
*SkyL is listening to you*
PPA: Oh great he is here.
RPG: What do we do!?
flyby: I say kick him!
*SkyL was kicked out of #soniccenter*
*SkyL has joined #soniccenter*
*SkyL was kicked out of #soniccenter with the message (AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH)*
Werey: I see so that's why he gets kicked?
Werey: I want to know why so?
*Werey was kicked out of #soniccenter with the message (You can join him! (by: Tails))
PPA: <_<
RPG: ?_?
*PPA reads a furry comic*
RPG: :O
DaleG: Ok so he just proved he was a furry just now?
PPA: No, no! The comic has a furry cover!
RPG: So you are still looking at furries?
Eis: I think he is!
PPA: NO! I MEANT THE FRONT COVER HAS A FURRY SKIN!
Eis: That even makes it worse!
PPA: No no! The Comic is a normal comic with a furry velvety front
Nightmuse: PPA you should stop now. This is a battle you just can't win. :D
DaleG: Just except your furry fetish before you lose yourself.
*DaleG was kicked from #soniccenter with this message (You just lost yourself!)


Don't explain what this is! Just ponder.
Eis Makai is the Icy Coyote. Sumaru Star is the Ice Dragon. I own the Ice Planet!

Offline Alondite

Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #81 on: April 07, 2009, 09:31:46 pm »
Explanation plz?

For a straight person to be called the most sexual is just plain wrong...
Sexual orientation is completely uncorrelated to a person being sexually minded.
"most sexual" refers to the latter, not the former, and of all the people on the forum Alondite seems to be the most likely to be thinking about sex at any given time. Your arguement makes no logical sense.

Indeed. Why I'm even thinking about sex right now!

Offline General Throatstomper

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #82 on: April 07, 2009, 11:49:24 pm »
I walked to the music store the other day to buy a capo. I looked around a bit to see what else they were selling, and the markup was ridiculous. A triangle cost $30, miracas were $20, and small plastic shells filled with beads ran $10. The cost of material and labor can't possibly approach what they charge...plus, most of these 'instruments' have awful timbre or aren't complex enough where anything other than tonality matters.  There's so much scamming going on with peddling musical paraphernalia that the industry sidesteps by claiming that anything quality is expensive to create (though...they really aren't). I grumbled a bit about supporting corporate greed before settling on some picks and an economical $2 capo. But this wasn't what I meant to talk about.

I'll always remember what happened on my way home from the store. I took a shortcut through a valley between two streets, and heard a moaning noise. Then I noticed two people making out behind a tree. I couldn't see them on my way into the valley, but suddenly I was walking towards them for a decidedly awkward encounter. The guy had his eyes open, staring right at me while tonguing the girl for a slightly suggestive scene. I flashed him a thumbs up. He gave me a sign to hang loose. It made a pretty good story. I have another story about kissing, but I don't think flyby would find it entertaining.

I have a family friendly anecdote about fencing, though. We were dueling today, swapping from partner to partner, and I got into it. Swords are fun to play with, and anybody who tells you otherwise doesn't understand the concept of 'fun', or perhaps only appreciates the idea intellectually without any deeper understanding. You should take pity on them, but assertively repel their impositions on your own enjoyment. Ok? Ok.

We were dueling in fencing, and I was enjoying myself. I get kind of into it; swords are still fun. So I get into it, and as a leftie basically anything I try will connect. Really, most of these swordfights were five-second exchanges where I'd push their sword out of the way and stab through to the stomach. Most people are confused by mirrors.

Actually, more context is necessary than this. Light taps from the foil usually hurt, and I really whip that blade. During accuracy drills, I poked a hole through the foam padding on the gym wall. That's pretty thick protection...a solid few inches. Usually when I hit a person, they need to take a few seconds to get over the sting. With rotating partners, everybody expects that the same thing will happen to them.

Anyways, I'd gone through a few opponents and came up against a girl known for her pronounced sensitivity. Everything you do with her is the most significant thing to ever happen in her life, and she gets upset very easily. She'd been watching me take people out and make them crumple in pain for a long while. We were supposed to fence each other, and she freaked out when we started. She backed away panicked, jerky foot then to foot then to pavement. I didn't even advance, and she told me I scared her. I decided that I would be nice to her as a gesture of good will; clearly she was uncomfortable with fighting me, and a jab to the stomach would ruin her day. The teacher wasn't looking, so I told her we could just pretend that we went at it and I made contact. Then, as she was walking towards the center, she smashed my hand with the hilt of the rapier. Seriously, what the hell? Next time, I'm aiming for her kidney. 


I HOPE YOU DO

Offline Alondite

Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #83 on: April 08, 2009, 04:30:32 pm »
I walked to the music store the other day to buy a capo. I looked around a bit to see what else they were selling, and the markup was ridiculous. A triangle cost $30, miracas were $20, and small plastic shells filled with beads ran $10. The cost of material and labor can't possibly approach what they charge...plus, most of these 'instruments' have awful timbre or aren't complex enough where anything other than tonality matters.  There's so much scamming going on with peddling musical paraphernalia that the industry sidesteps by claiming that anything quality is expensive to create (though...they really aren't). I grumbled a bit about supporting corporate greed before settling on some picks and an economical $2 capo. But this wasn't what I meant to talk about.

I'll always remember what happened on my way home from the store. I took a shortcut through a valley between two streets, and heard a moaning noise. Then I noticed two people making out behind a tree. I couldn't see them on my way into the valley, but suddenly I was walking towards them for a decidedly awkward encounter. The guy had his eyes open, staring right at me while tonguing the girl for a slightly suggestive scene. I flashed him a thumbs up. He gave me a sign to hang loose. It made a pretty good story. I have another story about kissing, but I don't think flyby would find it entertaining.

I have a family friendly anecdote about fencing, though. We were dueling today, swapping from partner to partner, and I got into it. Swords are fun to play with, and anybody who tells you otherwise doesn't understand the concept of 'fun', or perhaps only appreciates the idea intellectually without any deeper understanding. You should take pity on them, but assertively repel their impositions on your own enjoyment. Ok? Ok.

We were dueling in fencing, and I was enjoying myself. I get kind of into it; swords are still fun. So I get into it, and as a leftie basically anything I try will connect. Really, most of these swordfights were five-second exchanges where I'd push their sword out of the way and stab through to the stomach. Most people are confused by mirrors.

Actually, more context is necessary than this. Light taps from the foil usually hurt, and I really whip that blade. During accuracy drills, I poked a hole through the foam padding on the gym wall. That's pretty thick protection...a solid few inches. Usually when I hit a person, they need to take a few seconds to get over the sting. With rotating partners, everybody expects that the same thing will happen to them.

Anyways, I'd gone through a few opponents and came up against a girl known for her pronounced sensitivity. Everything you do with her is the most significant thing to ever happen in her life, and she gets upset very easily. She'd been watching me take people out and make them crumple in pain for a long while. We were supposed to fence each other, and she freaked out when we started. She backed away panicked, jerky foot then to foot then to pavement. I didn't even advance, and she told me I scared her. I decided that I would be nice to her as a gesture of good will; clearly she was uncomfortable with fighting me, and a jab to the stomach would ruin her day. The teacher wasn't looking, so I told her we could just pretend that we went at it and I made contact. Then, as she was walking towards the center, she smashed my hand with the hilt of the rapier. Seriously, what the hell? Next time, I'm aiming for her kidney. 


Genus, meet women (not that I'm insinuating that you have not had other experiences with women). 

That reminds me of when my ex-girlfriend and I used to wrestle (yeah, sounds mismatched, but wrestling with your girlfriend is great fun).  So I would basically grab hold of her wrists and just keep her from doing anything, at which point she would say "Ow, you're hurting me," even though I was barely holding onto her.  So I would let her go, and then she would take the chance to jump on top of me and attempt to hold me down.  Now she's not very heavy, so if I really tried I probably could have tossed her off (she actually got pretty good after awhile, and it took some doing to get her off), but honestly, what straight guy is going to push off a girl who is laying all over him? Certainly not I.

Offline EngiNerd

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #84 on: April 08, 2009, 06:16:30 pm »
genus has had another experience with a woman.  He proceeded to swallow her gum.
Im in ur TSCz, climin ur chartz!
My presssioussss....

Offline Aitamen

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Re: I'm at work and TSC should entertain me!
« Reply #85 on: April 09, 2009, 09:01:05 am »
Explanation plz?

For a straight person to be called the most sexual is just plain wrong...
Sexual orientation is completely uncorrelated to a person being sexually minded.
"most sexual" refers to the latter, not the former, and of all the people on the forum Alondite seems to be the most likely to be thinking about sex at any given time. Your arguement makes no logical sense.

I refrain from discussing my sexuality only because it offends people here...  Unfortunately, there seems to be little ground for competition without offending others, in this case, so I'm unsure of how we could go about setting a test for it...

further, I would wager that Alondite's conversations concerning sex and my conversations concerning sex are very different...  I would wager he's much more vanilla than I, and thus, his arguments and anecdotes are more commonly accepted.  If my bisexuality alone doesn't settle that part, I'm sure the things I don't talk about would...

More on-topic, I honestly cannot view fencing with anything better than mild disdain.  Fencers in MWC tend to be the bottom-of-the-barrel (MWC = Mix Weapon Combat).  High skill doesn't quite make up for inability to disarm an opponent effectively...  technical disarms are worth fewer points than a disarm (technical disarm = they lose grip/drop their weapon... true disarm is breaking the weapon, or otherwise rendering it worthless)

Kudos to those who practice it, for it is great fun,  but I'll always prefer Kendo to Fencing.  (The look on a fencer's face when you shatter his weapon is something most entertaining)

A left-handed fencer?  Rather, an Ambi using a lefty-stance?  I could see there being many problems with fighting against such a thing...  I've never fought a lefty in anything but Kendo, and they were never any real challenge because I, too, am unorthodox...

Closer to "topic":

my roomie has gotten his old job back, and I'll finally be on more often!  I GET TO LIVE MORE YAY!
Year 33 — The Malkavians claim that their greatest practical joke happened during this year, when they perform a bit of graverobbing  in Jerusalem.
-- Vampire: The Masquerade

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