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How to Replace Shoulder Buttons with, say, a Small Piece of a Chicken's Liver


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Author Topic: How to Replace Shoulder Buttons with, say, a Small Piece of a Chicken's Liver  (Read 2753 times)

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Offline General Throatstomper

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Sondow wants me to tell him how to mod his DS so that he can snake in MKDS. For the uninformed, snaking requires extensive use of the 'R' button, which is obviously impossible, or at least very difficult for Sondow.

So if you don't like the R or L buttons on your DS, follow *this guide* to replace one with...something else.

You will need:

-Screwdrivers (I have no idea what model is required...for good measure bring a few different kinds. Not a flathead, though. I'm sure the screws on the DS require a Philip's Head. So bring a bunch of screwdrivers that are not flathead screwdrivers. You may get lucky.)
-Adhesives
-Something bendy (Make sure it's heavy enough to move the contact pins of the DS)
-Something useful for prying
-Something useful for cutting (maybe...)
-An extensive warranty to cover damages incurred (hur.)
-A plastic baggy to place the screws in when they are unscrewed because if you unscrew some small screws, the small unscrewed screws have a tendency to roll off somewhere. It's tragic when it happens because then your frame will only be partially secure, and you'll look for the screw and not find it. You'll go to a nearby hardware store after a protracted period where you look for this screw and can't find it, only to find that the screw on your DS is of an unusual make and not readily available. They'll offer you another similar screw that you'll buy out of desperation, only to find out that this similar screw does not fit, or fits but won't screw all the way. In desperation you'll do something stupid like use a power drill to try and for the screw, only to penetrate the circuitry of the DS. Once you try and get those parts replaced you'll be told you need another DS, which is not where you want to be. Years later you'll fall on the carpet and a screw will be lodged in your knee, requiring extensive medical attention which come with a hefty fee because you have bad insurance. So make sure you have a plastic baggy.

The Procedure

1) Allright so you've assembled your materials and are ready to march in to action. You'll notice several holes with screws on the DS. Pick a screwdriver you think will work, and unscrew each...well, screw...connected to the frame, then pop it out. Do NOT unscrew the battery pack, unless you want to play with your battery or filter lithium from it to, say, inject in the food of an unstable individual on antidepressants to upset their brain chemistry and drive them to suicide. Place each screw in the plastic baggy. I'm only going to warn you about this once more.

2) Keep an eye on the plastic baggy with screws in it. A nearby pet, meddling individual, or environmental cataclysm may quickly leave you clueless as to its whereabouts if you're going to act like a total spacecase and not watch it for the duration of your manic modding spree. Bring a trusted friend to monitor its location if you feel you will not be able to concentrate on two things at once...however, make sure that this trusted friend did not recently lose a screw off their DS or they may turn on you for personal gain. If you are a sap and loose your screws anyways, volunteer to watch a friend's baggy with screws and pocket as many as you need, being tactful in providing a valid reason for the abscence of screws, such as a perforated bag, or the screws' existential crisis rendering them to nothing. Alternatively, you could break into houses in the dead of night, and remove the screws off their DS...es?

3) Using your 'something useful for prying', remove the offending button by prying. Be logical in what you use; a crowbar, for example, is much to large for your task, while a match is of suitable size but is not useful for prying. I suggest a fingernail, a nail clipper, a pencil, or for the masculine your bare hands. It shouldn't be too hard to pop the button out...just be sure not to bend the contact pins.

4) Now you need something bendy, and something else to keep it in place. Using the adhesive of your choice, such as tape or woodglue (Warning: sarcasm. I strongly advise you against using and type of glue, if you don't know why then please walk away), attach the end of whatever bendy thing you chose to the area SURROUNDING the contact pins, but not the pins themselves. The bendy thing should rest on the pins. In the off chance the piece connecting the R button to the pins can be removed, then take that off, fasten it in place, and attach the bendy thing to the piece. The end of the bendy thing not secured to the contact pins should be coming out more or less diagnolly.

5) Bend the other end of the bendy thing to an area you are able to access with ease. Attempt to push that button while playing a game where its effect will be visible. If nothing happens, try folding the bendy thing over a few times in something of an 'S' form.

6) Reattach the frame of the DS, since dust will more or less make it unusable otherwhise.

This is of course a rather long workaround to, say, accessing the debug menu for a game and swapping button functionality. The better way would involve a soldering iron, desolderer, and extensive knowledge of electronics, but I can almost guarantee someone winds up bricking their DS if they try this.

So...what should you use that's bendy? That all depends on what kind of a person you are. What you select should reflect you as a person, and at the same time be practical enough for regular use. A man very fond of silly putty might choose that to replace his shoulder button. Someone like Mike could attach an inflatable toy hammer with the word 'ban' on it, and someone like RPG might opt for...well, think it through and apply the obvious joke. People will see something sticking out of the corner of your DS, and it's going to spark conversations, so make sure it's consistant with your person. You don't want someone eyeballing your banana, and assuming you are a fruit enthusiast when you in fact do not like fruit. The same goes for a cow's tongue, a rubber pencil, an oversized bendy eraser, or just about anything else. Make your something bendy your own.

Literary masterpiece, or howto comedy gold?


I HOPE YOU DO

Offline Selphos

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...Actually, I don't trust myself enough to do this. Thanks for posting it though.
The moon is so red. Looks like it's going to be a fun night.

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