The Sonic Center Constitution of Infallibility

 

SECTION I: ITEMS PERTAINING TO THE SONIC CENTER

 

Overview: The Sonic Center is the best site ever. Under no circumstances is this statement to be challenged, and any User who challenges this statement will be subject to the BANHAMMER.

TSC specialises in the completion of Sonic games at an exceptionally high standard. Its Users carry this standard into all its other facets of their daily lives: high standards of ethical and moral conduct, intelligence and melee combat are paramount.

 

Part I – Roles of Users

·        Rolken – The administrator, spiritual leader and wielder of the BANHAMMER at TSC. His word is law, unless it contradicts any statement in this Document.

·        flyby – Rolken’s hot wife. Holds absolute control over Rolken, and zero control over TSC.

·        SadisticMystic / SprintGod / yse – In the absence of Rolken, SM, Sprint and yse fill all administrative roles, as well as the detection of cheaters, morons, and miscellaneous spies.

·        Spaceship Users – A large amount of additional chosen TSCers represent the site as moderators, exemplary competitors, and assist the four administrators where necessary. Are occasionally seen in spaceships, but have also been known to travel along rainbows. Users in this category universally aspire to one day wield a BANHAMMER.

·        Underlings – This category of users does as it is told at all times, and can be expected to scrub floors, wash dishes and clean dust for any of the higher-level Users. Are permitted to submit the occasional Statistic, but not one that surpasses that of a higher-level User. Disobeying this command is punishable by BANHAMMER.

·        Liars – Not welcome. No questions asked. Unless you’re Dale.

 

Part II – Rules of the Site

1.      The Site is to be used for the sole purpose of the submission of Statistics to be ranked against other Users, or Guides or Videos explaining the methods by which these Statistics may be attained. An exception to this rule is for people in the Liar category, who can submit anything they like for 45 minutes and are then permanently removed from the site, along with all their Statistics.

2.      At the bottom of the main page is a “News Updates” bar, where the most recent ten notable achievements are stored. This is generally used by Users to show off and profess their coolness.

3.      As the traffic on TSC directly impacts on world events, it is the Administrators’ civic duty to keep traffic, and hence the world, in balance. Therefore if Iran starts firing nuclear weapons at the West, the administrators reserve the right to ban all they deem necessary until the problem is resolved.

4.      Points obtained in officially sanctioned Tournaments are not redeemable for Sitewide Points, or vice versa.

5.      Exactly half of Users must be named either Mike or Dan, even if TSC has an odd number of members. This means Users may have to change their name periodically or split themselves in half to comply.

 

Part III – Rules of the Forum

1.      You can say whatever you like, pretty much.

2.      If your name is Paul Corby, don’t post.

3.      Take another look at rule 2 just to make sure.

4.      If you’re pressing Submit on your third one-liner in a row, you might want to stop and think about the quality of what you’re posting.

5.      If you’re having problems with flood control, see rule 4.

6.      If your sigs are longer than your posts, see rule 4.

7.      Be nice.

8.      If you’re having problems with rule 7, don’t expect people to like you.

9.      Don’t quote anything you’re not responding to. We’ve already read it once.

10.  Coloured text is pointless and annoying.

11.  The photo option is for photos. That is why it is described as such. Use it appropriately.

12.  thos of u who talk lik dis will be even more ostracised in here than usual.

13.  Users are required to observe a certain Standard of Epicness. This standard should be observed at all times, without fail, under threat of BANHAMMER.

 

Part IV – Rules of the Chatroom

In the Chatroom, some roles are changed. They are detailed below:

·        Rolken assumes the mantle of founder of #soniccenter and Keeper of the Tilde. Anyone who uses the tilde (~) in the Chatroom may be subject to a kick from the room unless express written consent is given to use it. His word is still law.

·        Sprint and yse, placed just below Rolken, have positions signified by the ampersand (&) symbol, as a reference to the banning power they wield. Their word is law in the absence of Rolken.

·        Several users, mostly of the Spaceship User category but also CherryMay and flyby, are identified by their @ symbol, which has no significance but serves as a reminder that they’re more powerful than everyone below them.

·        Some people have a % symbol instead. These people are among the very few certified females on the internet, and are granted a token position under TSC’s Endangered Species Protection Scheme. They are to be treated with respect lest the BANHAMMER hit you.

·        The remaining regulars have a + symbol. This means absolutely nothing.

·        Everyone else remains at the usual Underling level. The usual rules applying to Underlings (as specified in Section I Part I) apply here.

·        TSC has its own IRC applet accessible from the Site – however, it should not be used under any circumstances.

 

SECTION II: ITEMS PERTAINING TO SITES OTHER THAN THE SONIC CENTER

 

Overview: As mentioned earlier, TSC is the best site ever. Therefore, by a simple process of deduction, this means that other sites are of lesser worth to Users than TSC. However, the amount of worth that can be derived from these sites varies, as explained below.

 

Part I – Other Sonic the Hedgehog-related Sites

·        Examples of sites in this category include: The Sonic Stadium, Sonic-Cult, Sonic Cage Dome, and Sonic Vegemite.

·        These sites generally hold little value to Users, as the users of these other sites generally do not comply with TSC’s standards of excellence. Higher-level Users are permitted to visit these sites in order to recruit the few members who do comply with these standards, but Underlings are generally kept within the confines of TSC at all times in order to prevent exposure to these sites.

·        One aspect of Sonic-related sites which is inadvisable are those life forms styling themselves “furries”. These life forms are not permitted at TSC under any circumstances, and can be expected to meet the same fate as Liars.

 

Part II – Other video game competition-related Sites

·        Examples of sites in this category include: Speed Demos Archive, TASvideos, MarioKart64.com, Cyberscore and The-Elite.

·        These sites are generally of great value to Users, as the users of these sites tend to have highly developed skills, and would be good recruitments to TSC. The videos provided by these sites can also help Users to develop their own skill bases. Additionally, they provide another arena in which Users can show off.

·        An exception to this rule is Cyberscore, which should be avoided by Users at all costs.

 

Part III – Permissible non-related Sites

·        Examples of sites in this category include: Google, Wikipedia, and miscellaneous news sites.

·        These sites have the potential to be beneficial to Users, as they can broaden one’s knowledge of the world around them. Care should be taken to only read reputable sources, i.e. American sites should not be considered.

 

SECTION III: UNIVERSAL TRUTHS

 

Overview: In any walk of life, people come across things that they were not aware of before, and yet are just as true as the sky being blue, or day following night, or pigs being able to fly. In this section these universal truths which Users should observe at all times are documented.

 

Part I – Universal Truths pertaining to The Sonic Center

·        The Golden Rule: Whenever Andy is sure of something, he’s BSing.

·        Correct tenses with the /me command are for other chat rooms.

·        We run down the street with only gloves and boots on and destroy cars.

·        The topics are always relevant.

·        Holy crap we’re awesome!

·        We break servers.

·        PPA is a furry!

·        THE FUN CAN NOT BE HALTED.

·        Cherry would rather have a tiger :(

·        This space intentionally left blank.

 

Part II – Universal Truths pertaining to other sites

·        We own Stadium and Cult because they can’t play.

·        Zizou really is lol.

·        Kogen is a spic.

·        SCD don’t realize how good we are.

·        We want to know how they came up with the name “Microsoft Powerpoint”.

·        Sonic is not in Brawl.

·        Sonic is in Brawl!

 

APPENDIX A

Abbreviations used in this Document:

·        TSC – The Sonic Center

·        TSS (or Stadium) – The Sonic Stadium

·        Cult – Sonic-Cult

·        SCD – Sonic Cage Dome

·        User – Member of The Sonic Center

·        Site – The Sonic Center main site

·        Forum – The Sonic Center forum

·        Chatroom – The Sonic Center chatroom

 

APPENDIX B

Version History/Amendments:

 

1st Amendment: Comma (,) changed to a full stop (.) somewhere.

2nd Amendment: Keeper of the Tilde changeover, yse added to banning category

3rd Amendment: More Universal Truths added.

4th Amendment: Abbreviations added.

5th Amendment: flyby’s status corrected to “Rolken’s hot wife.”

6th Amendment: SCD link corrected.

7th Amendment: A couple of amendments re-ordered.

8th Amendment (13/11/07): Lots of cool stuff.